How to Know She Doesn't Love You

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Loving a girl who doesn't love y'all is tough, but it's not uncommon. This scenario has fueled much of the great fine art in the world. Unfortunately, if someone does not beloved you lot, you won't exist able to alter their listen. Your only course of action is to accept the truth, sever your ties with her (at to the lowest degree for a while), and focus on healing.

1. 1

   Expect for clues. When you really care for someone, it tin be easy ignore the signals that they do not experience the same fashion. The longer yous ignore these, yet, the longer you will draw out your rejection and heartache.^[1] Some indicators include:

   • She won't make fourth dimension for you.
   • She doesn't return your texts/calls.
   • She never reaches out to you to make plans.
   • She says she likes you lot every bit a friend.
   • She's not interested in physical amore.
   • She has told you lot that she's non in honey with you.

2. 2

   Accept that its over. Whether you lot've noticed a series of signs or the girl has straight up told you that she doesn't take feelings for you, you lot need to do some work to accept that it is truthful. The heart wants what information technology wants and it can very rarely be swayed otherwise. Don't imagine that you will modify her mind. Take her at her discussion and accept that information technology's over.^[ii]

   • It can be helpful to say it out loud to yourself or a friend.
   • You lot might say, "My relationship with Katie is over. Katie doesn't love me."

   EXPERT TIP

   Sarah Schewitz, Psy.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist by the California Board of Psychology with over 10 years of feel. She received her Psy.D. from the Florida Constitute of Applied science in 2011. She is the founder of Couples Larn, an online psychology practice helping couples and individuals improve and modify their patterns in dearest and relationships.

   

   Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
   Licensed Psychologist

   Rejection isn't a reflection of your worth. It doesn't mean yous're not worthy or you're non good plenty, it just means there wasn't a skillful lucifer betwixt the two of yous. For somebody else, you're the best person on the planet.

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3. 3

   Experience your feelings. When you experience rejection, you are likely to experience a range of emotions, including atheism, acrimony, and sadness. Do whatever you need to do to feel these feelings and to process them.^[iii]

   • Cry if you feel similar crying.
   • Talk to your friends.
   • Write in a journal.
   • Comfort yourself with things you similar, such as ice cream, hot baths, or movies.

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1. 1

   Avoid contact with her. In order for you lot to heal, you demand space. If you love a girl and she doesn't love y'all, y'all can't just go on pretending to be friends. You're not friends: she is the daughter y'all dear. So until yous have truly moved on from this heartbreak, you need to avert any unnecessary contact with her.^[iv]

   • Consider deleting her number from your phone to avoid calling/texting her.
   • Stay away from places you know she is likely to exist.
   • This may hateful missing out on sure parties or social gatherings, only it'due south worth it.
   • If y'all absolutely must run into her (for instance, if you work together) go on your interactions brief and professional person.

2. 2

   Stay away from her online profiles. In the modern era, we take our friends at the touch of a button. Unfortunately, this ways yous have images of the daughter-who-doesn't-honey-y'all at the bear on of a button too. Although information technology is tempting, avoid visiting her pages on social media. Perhaps even consider blocking her (at least temporarily). You need the space to heal and you lot can't practise that if you are cyber-stalking her every movement.^[5] In order to avert her online presence, y'all may want to:

   • Spend less time on social media.
   • Unfollow her on social media sites.
   • Avert visiting the pages of mutual friends.
   • If you happen to come up across her, quickly put your telephone abroad (or close your laptop) and walk abroad. Don't let yourself become sucked in.

3. 3

   Refrain from intimate contact. If yous know that this girl doesn't dear you, practice not allow her to plow to you for emotional back up or physical contact. Although this may be very tempting, it is only going to crusade you pain. If she reaches out to y'all, you must find the fortitude to pass up.^[vi]

   • Y'all really shouldn't exist communicating with her anyway!
   • If she reaches out to you, simply tell her, "I need to accept a piffling space for myself right now. I don't retrieve we should be spending time together."

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1. 1

   Avert interim on feelings of vengeance. In one case you take that she doesn't dear yous, yous may move through sadness and into anger. Yous may desire to lash out or even seek some sort of revenge (towards either the girl or somebody new that she is dating). It is perfectly natural to accept these thoughts, merely information technology's not okay to act on them. Seeking vengeance will not make her honey you, it won't feel every bit skillful equally you think, and you could get into trouble. Instead, allow these thoughts to come and become, so that you lot can move on.^[seven]

   • You should also resist the urge to talk badly almost her to mutual friends. It will only make you look catty.
   • In the offset, y'all might vent to a couple of shut, trusted friends. Then try non to talk nigh her anymore.

2. 2

   Have fun. In gild for you to move on, you need something positive to overshadow the negative. Attempt to have some fun! Hang out with friends and go dancing. Spend an evening doing karaoke, or travel someplace new. Even if y'all don't feel like having fun, force yourself to exit there and endeavor. It will probably be improve than yous recollect!^[8]

3. 3

   Focus on a goal. Y'all can't control who she loves. The but thing you have command over is yourself. At present is a great time to focus on some form of cocky-improvement. Accept you e'er wanted to play the guitar, workout more, or excel in school? At present is an excellent time to put your focus on a new goal.^[nine]

4. 4

   Requite information technology some time. Unfortunately, at that place is no magic pill you can accept to go rid of your heartbreak. Instead, this process is going to accept time. And fifty-fifty subsequently a long string of good days, a bad solar day might sneak upwards on you. That's normal. Just remember that this is a process, and y'all are healing a footling bit every solar day.

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• Don't go looking for love straight after rejection. Give yourself some time to heal.

• Don't let ane rejection ruin you lot. If you get bitter or get cocky-loathing, you volition only put other people off you.

• Don't hold a grudge against the daughter! If you exercise that, you lot will only brand things worse, and you could end up losing other friends.

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Article Summary X

If y'all're trying to deal with a girl that doesn't beloved you, tell yourself or a friend that your relationship is over, since proverb it out loud can help you lot accept information technology. For case, you might say, "My relationship with Katie is over. Katie doesn't love me." Find a way to express your feelings, which may include anger or sadness, past writing in a journal or crying. In order to move on, cutting ties with her by deleting her number from your telephone and trying to avert places where you know she'll exist hanging out. Unfollow her on social media sites and don't visit her page, since you need space to go over her. If she reaches out to you to ask for support, reject past proverb something similar, "I need to have some space for myself correct at present." To shift your focus to something else, find an activeness that makes you lot happy, such as hanging out with friends, going dancing, or traveling. For tips from our Counseling co-author on how to command feelings of anger and vengeance, read on!

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